please grant me more patience

The pain in my head increases, the hormones are running up and down and here n there, seems like the world is upside  down, and gravity is running away ,and am rotating with the earth , tears and words running out of me, blood is rushing in me, everything is going against my wishes , and suddenly, all goes normal, seems i was in some roller coaster ride for few seconds. 

This happens when am all tried after all the work and finally out of a relaxed bath, and I see a big mess in the place , where I had just cleaned and left . 

I don’t know whom to blame and I tend to blame everyone , finally cleaning it up all on my own , and giving up shouting at everyone. I hate rework ,a and for past few years, thats what am doing every now and then . This year with my lil naughty one around,  its like double work for me , my elder one and their dad. 

Nothing is set right, the house is always upside down , nothing is in its proper place, nothing is beautiful , nothing is perfect. From morning till night , My bones are always in a up and down motion , as I have to keep picking things , and keep it safe up , else , keep picking up my daughter , as she keeps falling or doing some mischief. 

But in the end, when she is off to sleep, I look at her lovely innocent face, and feel relaxed, atleast she is happy . The way she holds on to me, and looks into my eyes and says her silent whisper ,that she loves me, all my tiredness vanishes into thin air , and leave me in the guilt of being angry and at times too bad to them. 

I wish that suit too vanish into thin air as my tiredness. 😉