Lost in the droplets and perished

The sky was overshadowed and was an expecting a downpour any time as if the clouds were filled with water which was about to burst out. Thunder and lightning flashed in the sky.It was almost a busy day on the road. People rushing to their homes after their hectic jobs.

 

She was expectantly looking at the sky so that it rains.She loved rain, the smell of the rain drops hitting the soil, the tickling rain drops, that can drench her.

She had fond memories of rainfall as a child.

She remembered the time w hen she used to run out of the house whenever it rained and off to dance around in the rain. As she grew older restriction put the locks on her feets, and then she was only allowed to make paper boats and set them free on the puddles.

 

Her feet craved to feel the wetness of the sand, the drops that fall from the infinity as if planting a kiss on her. Whenever she extends her hand out of the balcony to catch a raindrop to feel the pressure of holding it in her small palms, she observed the drop flowing down her hands and leaving her palms. The drops were like her, never ever wanted to be caged but when caged they perished themselves into the surface as if they never existed and became one with the surface leaving a small wet mark which gradually vanishes.

 

As she grew older again, things changed. She remembered her first month of her college, where she used to get out of her class with her bestie finding reasons to go out in the rain to feel it. She could still recollect the feel of the rain and the aroma that was spread across the college, it was a different feel for a teenager.

 

The moment she was out in the rain, even if it was a downpour or drizzle, she enjoyed it. The thoughts tickled her soul, where she used to have her umbrella in her bag, yet she enjoyed the company of her friend sharing the umbrella.In those times, the restrictions never tangled her, she was a lost soul, like an untangled flock of hair flying in the sky still linked to the roots.

 

She giggled at the memories that rain could bring into her. She missed the freshness of the rain and the amazing walk under a single umbrella holding her friend’s hands chitchatting about anything and everything.Those were the times when she hardly thought much and enjoyed the best time of her life.

 

The thought of her memories brought a smile on her face, but things have changed. Now there is no freshness in her rain, it was some random falls that never evoked her fondness. Everything has changed even herself.

 

She stood there with a bunch of people who were also like her standing under the shady areas to escape the rain. She stood there thinking for a while about nothing yet something.

 

Why she is running away from the rain, she loved so much once?

 

As she stood lost in thoughts wondering what exactly she was lost in. A hand grabbed her, and took her out into the rain, She sat right behind on the bike, and flew like a bird in the rain speeding through the light traffic, fondled by the drops reaching her every second from the sky.

 

She was happier again, felt like some kind of dip in the rejuvenating pond, all soaked up and drenched.The coldness was catching up to her body and the whispering wind was tickling her, but his presence was giving her the warmth.

 

She felt the rush of losing all the knots in her memories and enjoyed the moment as if she was floating in the clouds.

 

 

 

 

 

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The first imprint of motherhood

Her heart was beating uncontrollably. The thoughts made her smile.

She was incredibly excited and overwhelmed.

Her body was shivering, with the uncontrollable energy, she had exerted for the journey.

She was pale and blood was oozing out of her.

Some invisible hands were helping her stop bleeding and cleaning up.

She was totally absorbed in the excitement, her eyes searching for someone.

someone she was truly waiting for.

Someone who has transformed her in a second

Even if she was tired, uncontrollably happy that her body could not handle the happiness, her eyes waited

she was feeling cold, she wanted the warmth..held herself up on that not so comfy surface, eyes searching, she could hear a small tiny voice, but could not see what it looked like.

The seconds were killing her, all she wanted was a glimpse

Finally, her smiled before even her lips could put it up

And she was gifted at the very moment when they lay her baby girl in her arms all wrapped and cozy with her cute little face and incredibly small hands out of the wrap.

she was overjoyed, happier than ever, luckier than ever and wealthier too.

She kissed her lil one, fed her the first bite of welcome drink from her very own breasts feeling the powerfulness and the worthiness of being a mom and giving a new life.

The first touch of her angel on her bare chest with those tiny hands were giving her goosebumbs.

The joy was unexplainable, all she wanted was to cuddle with her angel, and never be out of her sight.

All her pain, discomfort, shy everything just vanished into thin air.

The smiling face of her angel and the feel of her lips on her while sucking the milk remained in her heart forever and ever.

Leaving her first stepping stone in motherhood, an imprint forever.

Fiddling with her dreams

She decided to remain silent, quite impossible for her, though.

She felt like the moment she seems to decided silence, there was a battle going on in her mind, trying to convince that silence was never an answer. At times the words need to be out and left to be heard by others, else the conflicting words in the heart will remain there in total chaos. Silence kills her thoughts which are the catalysts of her emotions. The thought makes what she is now – convinced, confirmed and dedicated.

She silenced her decisions once she was determined to achieve.

She silenced her dreams, as it cannot be achieved.

She silenced her heart, as it was broken many times.

She silenced her feet, responsibilities, not to disturb other’s sleep.
She silenced herself to avoid being self-pitied.

At times the silence killed her soul, she was never what she wanted to be.

Overshadowed by the decisions of, fiddling in responsibilities, flying like new born bird who is trying to reach a branch while its initial flight.

Scared, lost, confused and hurt.

Yet she found the freedom of speech, a way to propagate her thoughts to reach the thousands who felt like her. Even though her lips never spoke, her voice was never head, her fingers moved and her words flew out into the blank pages.

She found the way to say and not to say. She was never silenced in her thoughts. Her thoughts were free and all she did was enjoyed the new found freedom of expression. To express or not to express was a choice, and to read and not to be read was another choice which she fought on her own.

The invisible hands that caught her

A sprawling layer of tea plantations around her.

All she could see through the misty surroundings was the vast stretch of tea plants spread across the land in front of her. She stood amidst it watching the fog covering the plantations and circling her. She felt lost in the mist.

It was like a soul was embracing her. A soul from an infinity carrying the fragrance of a wonderful aroma from the far end and perfumed with the spices of the south. The smell was like a drug to her, she felt she was all carried away to the west somewhere far beyond her thoughts could go.

She felt the invisible hands cuddling her and whispering in her ears. A welcome song to the enormous world of nature.She felt the need to spread her wings like the butterfly out of its cocoon and fly away.

The invisible hands held her hands high up in the air, slowly lifting it as if it was asking her to fly .. and fly away. The hands were powerful, the force was a great push, she couldn’t resist the thought.She felt like being invaded by the soul from the far west.

The winds were strong enough to wipe her off her feet and take her away. She stood there watching the marvelous mist encapsulating her body. The view became blurred as if she was blinded by the mist.

But she was enjoying the soft layered mist around her.The ambiguity and the uncertainty were having the greatest gravitational pull than the real life which she already was living. She couldn’t resist the push from the invisible hands. She knew she cannot fly, as her wings were already cut off, but the dream to be on her own was leading her.

All she wanted was to be free.

Free from all the worldly possessions, be like a butterfly fly around from one flower to another. Spreading her eye-catching beautiful wings and fluttering around the gardens of love and just love ..kissing every flower blooming in the spring, playing with kids in the garden guiding them to the enchanting nature and one day perish herself in nature.

All she wanted was to be free from all the tangles.

Let’s escape into the dreams

Dreaming and being lost in her dreams was something she loved.

She felt her dream land was far better to be in.

She closed her eyes as if they were glued together to forget her space in the real world.

Even before she slipped into her sleep, she wanted to dream, she works on her imagination wheel, to stir the ride to her Utopia. The world where she wants to enter even with her eyes open.

The best thing about her world is, everything is perfect, dreamy covered in snow, rain, greenery, flowers everything that she was fond of. The dreamland she built when she was hardly too small to understand what a dream was.

The perfect land had marvelous giant green-clad mountains, enormous shady trees that give her shade as well as contains her favorite tree house. She loved tree houses. She wanted to live amidst the green leaves and witness the beauty of the world around her, from her comfy treehouse. She dreamt of it many times, when she would be sitting on the deck and witnessing the beautiful world she crafted on her own.

She loved the long walks in the garden of love, where everything bloomed when she smiled and the grass comforted her when she lay there, as if in her mother’s womb, warm and comfortable.

She was perfectly imperfect in the real world she felt, but here in her world, she was the princess. She played with butterflies and birds. She was never tired of her world.

When the real world gets her messed up, her dreamland brings her back to normal. She takes a walk in the alluring beauty for a while, caressing everything with her soft hands on the way. The path was endless.

She could sit hours and admire the glass house of the dew drops on the leaves, which was a spectacular combination of nature colors.She smiled at the dew drop, trying to find out her own reflection in it. The drops were too small to contain her. She wanted to love someone, who could contain her image in their eyes.

In her world, nobody asked her to be pretty, no one complained about anything, she could walk around like a free bird, be messy and dirty and do everything she ever loved.

It was time to move on, she knew she would be back here in a jiff. She bid a lovely goodbye in the hope to be back again as she closed her eyes.

It was the perfect time in the morning, where the whole world sleeps and she wakes up to her alarm.

It was time for some reality !!!